The 1st Annual Goofy Awards

Rather than the usual yearly synopsis of events, this year, we're handing out awards. We'll call them the "Goofies" for formality's sake. You may have an Emmy, Tony, or even a Razzie, but odds are you don't have a Goofy. And would you really want one? Producer's Note: We apologize if this is tricky to read, Blogger was being a poophead.


Best Impersonation of Someone Smuggling a Watermelon and a Couple Cantaloupes....















The Goofy goes to...my Mom, hands down. Way to carry that produce and look happy while doing it. Dad was runner up.

Lifetime Achievment Award














The Goofy goes to Benji. In 2007, he headed for higher ground and we'll always remember all he gave us.


Best Performance by a Newcomer
















The Goofy for this one goes to Zach (yes, that adorable girl is me). He has proven himself to be a great addition to our family and has definitely been a joy to have around. We'd give him a most improved award too, if we were handing those out. He's made leaps and bounds in his development and temperment.

Yearning for Learning Award















Goes to ME of course! This past spring, my interest in all things science really took off. I loved to learn about the Solar System, plants, art and of course, dinos. I looked pretty darn cute while doing it, too. Mom has a hard time satisfying my need for knowledge some days. Although the day I told Dad that we came from monkeys was a sign to lay off the evolutionary science for now.


The Most Gracefully Aged Award















This Goofy goes to Mr. Goofy himself, or as I call him, Fasha. Like a fine wine or chunk of blue cheese, Dad turned 30 with grace, dignity and class. Plus, he doesn't stink as bad as blue cheese, so that's a plus.


Kentucky Waterfall Award















Goes to this random dude. He inspired us all that fine day and the Washington Cherry Festival. Rock on, Mullet Man!

Most Patriotic Dessert















It didn't taste too great, but nothing says "We Love America" like baby toe jam in the strawberries. And nothing says child neglect like baby bumbo on the counter. Ohhhhh, Zach, you crazy guy.

Best Celebrity Look-Alike

Historians think this may have been what Gilligan looked like before he went to the island and had to "eat light" for a few years. Love you, Uncle D.

Best Breakfast Ever

The award here goes to Chocolate Tinkerbell Cake with white frosting. Gotta love birthdays and guilty moms.

The Funiest-without-trying-to-look-like-an-un-PC-joke-award......

Goes to Zach for his "Colander Boy Superhero Costume". No inappropriatness here....

The "You're Bigger than a Whale" award goes to Papa

What did you think we meant? Runner up was April, literally.

You Just May Grow up to Be Fruity Award

Goes to Zach. Sorry, buddy, but your intense love for showtunes, dolls and fear of little girls has your Daddy worried.

The Biggest Surprise of 2007

Goes to Mom and Dad. Way to make it to the 5yr mark guys....a lot of people in Vegas are poor because of you. Just kidding!

The Most Bodacious Bump

This award goes to our friend, Leah. Way to own the bump.

Best Christmas One-Liner

This final Goofy goes to me. "Crackers for Christmas" may go down in infamy.

To all you lucky winners, you'll be receiving your awards via UPS in 7-9 business months. Congratulations and thanks for a fun 2007.